I hate it when expectations fall flat of reality. i have this amazing capacity to outdream things, expand them to an almost grandiose scale in my mind, only to have my hopes, what i believed to be true, become gradually deflated until it becomes nothing but dim reality. yike. that sounds so depressing, but it's just what's on my mind tonight because of a certain situation. which is all I'm going to say about that. Anyway!

it's been soooo long since i last posted something and i've kind of lost the swing of blogging, so forgive me if this post is a bit awkward. =) let's see...the last time that i posted, it was one week before the start of school and i was just embarking on my wonderful vacation to calgary, canadia! (yes, that's canadia, not canada! =P) i had an awesome time....a bunchful of thanks to Simon for letting me stay with you and showing me the sights of your beautiful hometown (even if it is almost ALWAYS below zero and my legs were always freezing underneath my cold, cold jeans!)...i finally got to see SNOW! =) it was quite beautiful indeed...PLUS, my trip to canada enlightened me to greater snacks like banana chips, vegetable thins, coffee crisp,, aero bars (in mint too!) and the priceless joy of savory instant noodles at three am...mmm...=) i had so much fun!!! and i miss you already =) oh yeah, it was also infinitely refreshing to breathe air so high up, so clear of the smog that is what we call "air" in la...haha no, i love my hometown of sunny diamond bar...especially these days since it's been raining for what seems like an eternity in berkeley so far! The sky must be crying with us fellow berkeley students as school started this week =( ....no actually my classes so far are okay...i know that i'll have to work my butt off this semester but it's okay because i'm prepared! no more breaking my new year's resolutions...from now on i have only one goal in mind...to succeed and not let myself get sidetracked anymore! =/ yep. that's right. =)

Tonight i went out to dinner with matt, henry, and company who i haven't seen in a looooong time! it was nice to see them and catch up with everything. =) plus, the food was delicious (i had barbeque chicken pizza and some of matt's yummy chicken fettucine!)....sheesh I've been so spoiled these past couple of days with GREAT dinners...my first night here richard and erika cooked a delicious meal of beef and spinach and fishballs...and then the night after we had dinner at eliza's which was soooo good. yummy korean barbeque (dunno what it's called really but it's kinda spicy and VERY savory! =P), dumplings, fish cakes, and brenda's DELICIOUS pork with *cough cough* peas and corn...my favorite...hehe =). no, everything was delicious! there's nothing better than having dinner with friends you cherish and love~

I miss winter break! I was reading erika's blog and she was reminiscing about the good times this past winter break, which got me to thinking how it all flew by so quickly! sure, there were times during break when I really wanted to come back up here because i was pretty sick of the mundanity of it all, but for the most part, I really had a lot of fun! What I miss the most about home isn't the food (even though it's great) or the hangouts or even the familiarity....what i miss the most about home isn't a thing, it's a person, a sentiment, a security, a reliability that I have yet to find anywhere else. No matter how much I surround myself with the hustle and bustle of school or friends or work, it's still always there at the end of the day, a tiny ache that just won't seem to cease. It's dear to me now like an old friend...without its ache there I would have nothing to remind me of you. You know who you are: I miss You.

It's getting late, and I have to wake up tomorrow for my ten am class (boring linguistics =/). so goodnight and sweet dreams to all...I bid you a happy start to spring semester and an even brighter road ahead. =P

by christine at 2:17 AM ©

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Monday, January 13, 2003

	Good Luck Bear Lucky you! You are one lucky person. You are not one to worry much about anything, trusting that everything will turn out great on its own. You also realize that you must risk things in life to gain happiness. However, your implusiveness gets you into trouble once in awhile. You spread your good luck to others with encouraging words that help others believe in themselves.
Take the Which Care Bear Are You? Quiz!